Venting...

I am surprised, not pleasantly though. Soon after my public admission and the attestation of the fact that 'I am a self reliant woman' , why do I still feel the need to lean on a trusted few? Why do I fervently text, mail or call them up at odd hours to vent my anger and exhasperation. Most of them let me release my rage and gladly pose as my punching bag. They are usually unruffled by my outbursts and hysteria. They ever so nicely lend me an ear till I heave a sigh of sheer helplessness. Then with a knowing smile playing on their lips ... they think , "I have witnessed this agitation before...and yet again you are making a mountain out of a mole hill!" . Its most natural for an outsider to find issues like; 'submission of extensive reports on short notice', 'a trainee not only being nonchalant but downright disruptive in the sessions', 'co-workers who think you are out to get them just because you have been assigned a responsibility which could disrupt their sluggishness and hence, become mildly sarcastic' trivial. However, they still listen, analyse and unabashedly give me their opinion...mostly with a word of advise thrown in. Finally, they make me reflect on how I chould have handled a particular situation and what it is that I can do to mend it.

I have to modestly admit that I, just like other human beings, have these moments of weakness wherein It feels nice to have someone to just be there to listen and acknowledge my feelings of disgust or dispair, as the case maybe. They could either be physically present to see and hear my woes or keep responding to my endless texting. If ever I am unable to vent my displeasure, I keep pondering and find it difficult to focus on the task at hand. Sometimes I would try to sleep with the event still playing on my mind...but I would fail, miserably. However, these occasions are few and far between. These few trusted souls that I have been talking about, usually come to my aid and help me see things more clearly. Even though I dont always agree with their point of view... it sure helps to vent :)

To know my text, mail or call will not go unattended... places my faith back in humanity. To know that the recipient will not mind the intrusion at ungodly hours... assures me I still have affinity with others. The knowledge alone, of this companionship and solidarity is what keeps an opinionated and an avid jabber like me at ease...